It's not easy to be me.....

I could not have said, read, or bled it better than you just did!!! You are spot on in everything you talked about. I really don't know what I could add to that except to cheer you on. You are amazing in the way you think, project, and dream. I was listening to a song this morning and the words in it are pretty relevant to you - at this time in your life. The decisions you are making, the dreams you are forming, and the path you are getting ready to embark upon. Go on Youtube and put in "It's not easy" it is actually the theme song to Superman but instead of thinking of the super hero of the big screen and comic books, put yourself in the equation and in the lyrics and then think about it. You are more than you think. You have lived and continue to live a great life. Dreams and goals are what will define you, what will motivate you, what will lift you as you achieve each one. Continue on your path of organization. Continue to clean out the cobwebs that feel like ropes tying you to a dream. It doesn't mean that you have to give up all that you have worked for and toward...it just means the focus will be different. You don't have to give up your marriage, your home, or your life as you know it, just mix it up a little, find the things that will bring diversity, life, and happiness into what you already have. I definately don't think giving it all up for Sky Ranch is the answer - that would be sudden death! Once you come here (for good) it is like life is really sucked out of you. Sometimes I just want to scream, to run, to escape, and to be the person I used to be. Then I come see you and I really feel healed to go on. We are different in many ways and situations, yet we are so in sync with what each other feels. I love you Ann. I have so much confidence in you and your decisions. I know that you will find what it is that God wants you to find. I know you will do what your heart tells you to do if you really listen. Whatever you do, remember you don't have to give up all that you have to find that happines. You will just need to shake it up a little or a lot and then see where the pieces fall. I love you so much. I will try to call tonight barring any unforseen tragedy...! In the song on YouTube it says "Even heros have to bleed" It's called the refiners fire. You are and continue to be my hero - for better or worse, in good times and bad. You're the best!